From 282d2f213607823e0d14f23c511327238a9171d6 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Doug Barton Date: Fri, 7 Dec 2007 22:22:35 +0000 Subject: [PATCH] Add some quotes from the television show "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" --- games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.real | 120 +++++++++++++++++++++++++ 1 file changed, 120 insertions(+) diff --git a/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.real b/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.real index 39d6b6e79136..e4825b4ca04f 100644 --- a/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.real +++ b/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.real @@ -2291,3 +2291,123 @@ No one is listening until you fart. % We are born naked, wet, and hungry, and get slapped on our ass ... then things get worse. +% +Angel: We need you to distract the vampires. +Buffy: Right. +Xander: What are you going to do? +Buffy: I'm going to kill them all. (Walking away) + That oughta distract them. + -- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "When She Was Bad" + Season 2, Episode 1 +% +Cordelia: Does looking at guns make you want to have sex? +Xander: I'm seventeen. Looking at _L_I_N_O_L_E_U_M makes me want to have sex. + -- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Innocence" + Season 2, Episode 14 +% +Oz: So, do you guys steal weapons from the army a lot? +Willow: Well, we don't have cable, so we have to make our own fun. + -- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Innocence" + Season 2, Episode 14 +% +Giles: What do you want? +Angelus: I want to torture you. I used to love it, it's been a long time. + I mean, the last time I tortured somebody, they didn't even _H_A_V_E + chain saws. + -- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Becoming, Part 2" + Season 2, Episode 22 +% +Alright, yes, date, and shop, and hang out, and go to school ... and +save the world from unspeakable demons. You know, I want to do girlie +stuff. + -- Buffy, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Faith, Hope & Trick" + Season 3, Episode 3 +% +The First: I'm not a demon little girl, I am something that you can't + even conceive. The first evil. Beyond sin, beyond death. + I am the thing the darkness fears. You'll never see me but I + am everywhere. Every being, every thought, every drop of hate. +Buffy: Alright I get it, you're evil. Do we have to chat about it all day? + -- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Amends" + Season 3, Episode 10 +% +Faith: Tell me you don't get off on this! +Buffy: It didn't suck. + -- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Bad Girls" + Season 3, Episode 14 +% +Wesley: I have in fact faced two vampires myself. Under controlled + circumstances of course. +Giles: No danger of finding those here. +Wesley: Vampires? +Giles: Controlled circumstances. + -- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Bad Girls" + Season 3, Episode 14 +% +For a thousand years I wielded the powers of the wish. I brought ruin +to the heads of unfaithful men. I brought forth destruction and chaos +for the pleasure of the lower beings. I was feared and worshiped across +the mortal globe. And now I'm stuck at Sunnydale High. A mortal. +A child ... and I'm flunking math. + -- Anya, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Dopplegangland" + Season 3, Episode 16 +% +In my world, there are people in chains and we can ride them like ponies. + -- Evil Willow, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Dopplegangland" + Season 3, Episode 16 +% +Buffy: It was exactly you Will, every detail. Except for your not being + a dominatrix, as far as we know. +Willow: Oh right, me and Oz play, "Mistress of Pain" every night. +Xander: Did anyone else just go to a scary visual place? +Buffy: Oh yeah. + -- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Dopplegangland" + Season 3, Episode 16 +% +Every single person down there is ignoring your pain because they're too +busy with their own. + -- Buffy, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Earshot" + Season 3, Episode 18 +% +Anya: Look, I know you find me attractive, I've seen you looking + at my breasts. +Xander: Nothing personal, but when a guy does that it just means + his eyes are open. + -- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "The Prom" + Season 3, Episode 20 +% +Buffy: No! You guys are gonna have a prom. The kind of prom that + everyone should have. I'm going to give you all a nice, fun, + normal evening; if I have to kill every single person on the + face of the earth to do it! +Xander: Yay. + -- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "The Prom" + Season 3, Episode 20 +% +Oz: Guys, take a moment to deal with this. We survived. +Buffy: It was a hell of a battle. +Oz: Not the battle. High School. + -- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Graduation Day, Part Two" + Season 3, Episode 22 +% +Buffy: How do you get to be renowned? I mean like, do you have to be + nowned first? +Willow: Yes. First there is the painful nowning process. + -- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "The Freshman" + Season 1, Episode 1 +% +Xander: Let me tell you something. When it's dark, and I'm all alone, + and I'm scared, or freaked out, or whatever. I always think, + "What would Buffy do?" You're my hero. Ok, sometimes when it's + dark and I'm all alone I think, "What is Buffy wearing?" +Buffy: Can that be one of those things that you never ever tell me about? +Xander: It's a deal. + -- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "The Freshman" + Season 1, Episode 1 +% +Buffy: Am I repulsive? If there was something repulsive about me, you'd + tell me right? +Willow: I'm your friend. I would call you repulsive in a second. + -- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "The Harsh Light of Day" + Season 1, Episode 3 +%