119 lines
3.6 KiB
Plaintext
Executable File
119 lines
3.6 KiB
Plaintext
Executable File
%% $FreeBSD$
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%% From The War Against The Chtorr,
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%% Copyright David Gerrold, 1984-2000, all rights reserved,
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%% used with permission of the author.
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%%
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%%© This is the copyright line.
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%%Eighty-nine is the year we assign.
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%% These verses are caroled
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%% by one David Gerrold.
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%%All rights are reserved. This is mine. *
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%%
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A limerick of classic proportion
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should have meter and rhyme and a portion
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of humor quite lewd,
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and a frightfully crude,
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impossible sexual contortion.
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From The War Against The Chtorr, (c) David Gerrold, 1984-2000, all
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rights reserved, used with permission of the author.
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%
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A limerick is best when it's lewd,
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gross, titillating and crude --
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but this one is clean,
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unless you are seen
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reading it aloud in the nude.
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From The War Against The Chtorr, (c) David Gerrold, 1984-2000, all
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rights reserved, used with permission of the author.
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%
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I wanted to print here a medley
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of limericks so gross they were deadly,
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but when the typesetter tried
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to set them, he died;
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(not to mention my editor, Smedly.)
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From The War Against The Chtorr, (c) David Gerrold, 1984-2000, all
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rights reserved, used with permission of the author.
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%
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I have written some limericks quite fateful,
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malicious and vicious and hateful;
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but I've torn up the jokes
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that will sicken most folks,
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and humanity ought to be grateful.
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From The War Against The Chtorr, (c) David Gerrold, 1984-2000, all
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rights reserved, used with permission of the author.
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%
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There was a young lady named Susie,
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Who everyone thought was a floozy.
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She liked boy scout troops
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and Shriners, in groups;
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"What the hell?" She replied. "I'm not choosy."
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From The War Against The Chtorr, (c) David Gerrold, 1984-2000, all
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rights reserved, used with permission of the author.
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%
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A fellow who lived in West Perkin
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was always a-jerkin' his gherkin.
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Said he, "It's not fickle
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to play with my pickle.
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At least my gherkin's a workin'."
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From The War Against The Chtorr, (c) David Gerrold, 1984-2000, all
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rights reserved, used with permission of the author.
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%
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A proctologist name of McGee
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once bent over double to see
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an eyeball of glass
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he had shoved up his ass,
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"--- so I can see one that looks back at me."
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From The War Against The Chtorr, (c) David Gerrold, 1984-2000, all
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rights reserved, used with permission of the author.
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%
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Bart has a singular penis
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for his wife who is built like a Venus.
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He awoke with a fright
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last Saturday night:
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"Hey! Something is coming between us!"
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From The War Against The Chtorr, (c) David Gerrold, 1984-2000, all
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rights reserved, used with permission of the author.
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%
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A lady who lives in New Delhi
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has habits disgusting and smelhi.
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She likes to eat feces
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of various species.
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(The recipe is tattooed or her belhi.)
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From The War Against The Chtorr, (c) David Gerrold, 1984-2000, all
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rights reserved, used with permission of the author.
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%
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A daisy chain isn't a riddle.
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just some folks who are happy to fiddle,
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by twos and by threes,
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on their backs or their knees,
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and it's fun getting caught in the middle!
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From The War Against The Chtorr, (c) David Gerrold, 1984-2000, all
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rights reserved, used with permission of the author.
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%
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A lad with a marvelous bend
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has no need of a lover or friend.
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What he does to himself
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would fill up a shelf,
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but alas, he has come to his end.
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From The War Against The Chtorr, (c) David Gerrold, 1984-2000, all
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rights reserved, used with permission of the author.
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%
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There was an old witch, name of Jessie
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whose crotch was all smelly and messie.
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She enjoyed a good squirm
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with an alien worm
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-- and got stains all over her dressie!
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From The War Against The Chtorr, (c) David Gerrold, 1984-2000, all
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rights reserved, used with permission of the author.
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